I don’t want to write. I don’t want to write at all.
…wait, that was starting to feel better. I feel like reading the Kameron Hurley book: The Geek Feminist Revolution. It’s in my pile of books to read. I already bought it. I’ve had it for months. It’s in my pile. I’m writing in the same inner monologue cadence as screenwriter Charlie Kaufman uses in Adaptation. I’m hearing this in Nicholas Cage. I am writing. This is shame.
I will write about The Birds. I am now looking at the spine of Wicked. I’ve already read that. I read that years ago. I started rereading it a few days into the New Year. I am participating in a social media blog promotion: the British Books Challenge. It’s quite eponymously about reading British books and posting about them. Wicked isn’t a British book; it was a counter-reaction to beginning the first few days of the new year beginning to reread The Hobbit. My blog post on The Hobbit is underway in another place. This is my post about The Birds.
My post about The Birds got underway in another place as well: on Twitter. (My post on The Hobbit is staunchly holding its place on my blog since I began it a few hours before midnight on New Year’s Eve.) My post about The Birds–which is this, by now–needs to take you on a detour to explain about how it started on Twitter. But first I’ll tell you that I read The Birds. The film is based on a short story, and I read it last weekend. The short story was written by a British woman. I’ll add it to my list for The British Books Challenge: “I read a short story by a British woman. Daphne du Maurier. It was 31 home printer pages’ worth of story, and I don’t know what to say about the story itself right now. I do know that the estate of du Maurier keeps a beautiful, informative homepage on the writer and her works, and the website–from the moment I came across it–was going to arrive in the post. I knew I’d want to mention it.”
I want to write about homepages, online references, archives at our fingertips–and I want to integrate discussion of these sources into my new batch of essays. Just like we toggle among many open windows on the computer, we can toggle in our research and critical writing among sources: primary texts, analyses of them, documentaries about them, resources, websites, social media mentions. I started out my writerly career in theater reviews, but now I can hardly hope to attempt writing without wanting to show the world the miracle of the many sources.
Being this voracious a geek is accompanied by this OCD about documenting–and narrating the documenting. Ah, it seems there *was* a reason that I had the voice from Adaptation in my mind as I began writing this. I don’t want to do a close reading of a primary text anymore–I want to have a fascinated geeky adventure while experiencing it and write about that.
I was interested in watching The Birds because of real live birds. Hear me out: maybe this essay isn’t about the movie itself yet (and maybe it won’t be much about the film itself at all), but it is about real live shame. The birds were how I decided to go vegan.
Last week I watched The Birds.